Trinity (2024) is an overt reflection on my younger self(s) and demonstrates an acceptance of all facets of that self. There are clear allusions to my Catholic and Iranian background and how that interacts with my queerness. I made this painting as an homage to my younger self after I turned 20, and it is my largest painting yet at 5 feet by 7 feet. The scale speaks to the gravity of reckoning with every awkward stage in your life as a queer person. I feel that preteen me(left) is the most in need of a pep talk from present me, as they were in the midst of middle school bullying by “friends” and not alike- made to feel like a freak and predator for failing to blend in. I would love to share with them the lovely and supportive friends I have now and the security in myself I have after realizing it isn’t my job to appease other people and do what they want, I can only do what is right for me. I think both younger versions of me would be proud of who we ended up being. Elementary age me (right) and current me would get along famously, as that version of me is untouched by the terror and awkwardness of puberty, and hasn’t learned to hate themselves yet. Painting this acted as a salve for unhealed teenage wounds and a group hug for all versions of myself and who we grow to be in the future.
